The Quest of Modern Mommies Everywhere

Having it all--the battle cry of practically every working mom across the U.S. We've all seen women who seem to manage to be a great mom, adoring spouse, successful career woman, community volunteer, loving daughter/sister/friend, and maybe a dozen or so other roles that we all pressure ourselves to fulfill in our daily lives. How do these amazing women accomplish so many great feats day in and day out? Do they really do everything well, or is "having it all" some unattainable state of being we working moms ascribe to achieve, but never really quite do? 

This, my friends, is what I am about to find out, and I'm taking you all on my journey. It all started seven and a half weeks ago, when I gave birth to our first child, Davis Allen (D for short). Well, I guess if you want to split hairs, it all started about 11 months ago...but I digress. He is such a blessing from God, and truly the center of our newly formed familial universe. I love him more than I ever thought possible, and am amazed at how much he changes and grows every day. 

But there is also a dirty little secret most moms don't talk about until you're "in the club." Being a new mom is HARD work. Now, don't get me wrong--I knew it wasn't going to be a complete cakewalk, but nothing can truly prepare you for the emotional and physical roller coaster those first few weeks with your newborn really are. Looking back, I wish I had known that things really would get better (and sooner, rather than later), and that one morning I would wake up feeling like I had turned a complete corner, and think to myself, "Wow, I feel like I'm getting the hang of this mommy thing." 

Until then, I felt like a complete and utter failure. Each day, a million new questions presented themselves. Why can't I figure out what his cries mean? Why does he cry all the time? Does he hate us? Wish he could crawl back into his cozy little abode inside of my tummy? Why does he spit up all the time? Why won't he sleep in his own bed? When will I ever get 8 continuous hours of sleep again? And why hasn't anyone written a manual for any of this stuff??? 

But eventually, you start to figure out what makes your baby tick. I can now decipher a hungry cry from a tired one. He wouldn't sleep in his bed because he hated to be on his back, so he sleeps on his tummy. We've made great strides in managing the spit up (Dr. Brown's bottles are the best). And who knew babies could suffer from acid reflux and that you could give them liquid Zantac to make it better? As far as sleeping at night, we've learned that giving him formula in the evening helps him sleep a little longer than an hour or two at a time. He now consistently sleeps for 4 to 6 hours before his first (and now, only!) feeding in the middle of the night. 

Next week, I will return to work full-time. Am I ready to go back to work? Yes. Do I feel guilty for not deciding to stay at home full-time? A little. But I know deep down that this is the best decision for me and my family at this point in our lives. Because what I've figured out so far is that you have to do what's right for you and your situation. This may not look anything like what your friend does for her baby, or even what your pediatrician recommends. After all, you spend the most time with your baby, and you have a right to make those calls without feeling any guilt about why you've decided to do things a certain way. 

With that said, this is all about my journey.  I do not claim to be an expert on anything at all; in fact, that's the other dirty little secret of mommyhood--everything is on-the-job training. It's all about learning on the fly, baby, and rolling with the punches, and I'll share my experiences along the way...